My Wednesday Devo....

Yesterdays devotion in "Jesus is Calling" by Sarah Young "just happened" to go right along with what we are reading and discussing. I thought I would pass along with everyone the "coincidence".

"Open you mind and heart-your entire being-to receive My Love in full measure. So many of My children limp through their lives starved for Love, because they haven't learned the art of receiving. This is essentially an act of faith: believing that I love you with boundless, everlasting Love. The art of receiving is also a discipline: training your mind to trust Me, coming close to Me with confidence.

Remember that the evil one is the father of lies. Learn to recognize his deceptive intrusions into your thoughts. One of his favorite deceptions is to undermine your confidence in My unconditional Love. Fight back against these lies! Do not let them go unchallenged. Resist the devil in My Name, and he will slink away from you. Draw near to Me, and My Presence will envelop you in Love."

My Lesson

Hello ladies! I have been wanting to share this story with you, but I'm terrible at speaking in front of others and much better at writing what I have to say. So, here goes!

I have been dealing with depression this year. I have a lot of anger, guilt, and sadness that has built up over the years. I have refused to deal with it before now. This year started out being one of the best of my life. I met a man through my friend and we started dating. It wasn't long before I was sure he was The One. We seemed to be a perfect match for each other and everyone around us thought so too. In mid-June, things started to go downhill quickly. My grandfather got very sick. He fought for 2 long weeks, but passed away on July 1. By the end of July, I had decided to at least take a break from grad school and get a second job. In the middle of August, out of nowhere, my boyfriend broke up with me. Of these three things, I have struggled with the loss of the relationship more than anything. I am ashamed to admit that, but it's the truth.

When I read the first chapter of this book, it didn't really grab me. I started to journal about what I had read (this is where writing works best for me), and the light bulb started to come on. I first started to realize that my boyfriend had been filling my need for security (he was paying for everything and he's 6'3", 250#). Then I realized that he was filling my need for belonging. Somehow through the course of our relationship, we were only hanging out with his friends and coworkers. Now that our relationship is over, all of the friends I had been seeing every weekend since February are not really there for me anymore. And finally I realized my significance came from being his girlfriend. People we saw every weekend may not have known my name, but they knew I was his girlfriend. Even my family, friends, and coworkers would ask about how we were doing before they asked about me. That brought me so much peace!

I have also started to understand that we try to get these needs filled by people all of the time instead of turning to God for it. Most of the anger, guilt, and sadness I was feeling before stems from one of these needs not being met by a person. I just felt like I really needed to share this with y'all! Have a good week!

found this book on Ann Voskamp's blog...

http://www.amazon.com/Grace-Good-Girl-Letting-Try-Hard/dp/0800719840/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1317003229&sr=8-1#_

Haven't read it, but it sounds like something that might be good for those of us with a less than rebellious story who also find ourselves in need of grace daily...

encouraging video on using scripture to fight back!

Goes right along with all we are learning and experiencing, Ladies. We are more than over comers. He's already won the battle, we just have to do our part for the battle of our minds.

Giving it to God!

Hello ladies! I just wanted to tell a quick story about my day and how God works. I had a “bored” today. For all of you that aren’t on top of the military lingo a bored is something you go to when you get nominated for an award. For instance I was nominated for Airman of the month. Well in order to win I have to go up in front of 3-4 people and answer questions about the Air Force, current events, and enlisted force structure. They judge you on your dress and appearance, military barring, and the way you answer the questions. (The whole person concept) Now, I can talk in front of people I don’t know, however when I am sitting in front of people who are judging everything I say and do Itend to get a little nervous. This however was not my first board. I have been up for Airman of the month about 9 times now but I have never won due to my nerves getting the best of me. I decided I didn’t want to go up for them anymore. I told my supervisor to please start nominating the other airman in the office for a while. I hadn’t gone up for a bored for a few months until today. I found out on Monday that I had a bored on Friday. I put it off and put it off and then last night I realized that my bored was today. So a friend of mine helped me study and get ready for it, even though I knew no matter how much I studied I would ruin it by my nerves. Well I shared my nerves with my amazing roommate and awesome friend. She said to just pray about it, something I never have thought to do. Well on my way out the door this morning I ran into Jessica and Jeanna. They could tell I was very nervous and to say the lease unenthusiastic about going to my bored, so we prayed together and asked God to let me be calm and just do my best. So I get to the bored and of course as usual my stomach is full of butterflies. I was so nervous like I always am. Then one of the verses that Jessica posted on this blog the night before came through my mind,Philipians 4:13, “For I can do everything through Christ, who gives me strength.” As I walked into the room of the 3 scary sergeants that were judging every step I took I felt the nerves disappear. I answered my questions with ease I did everything I was supposed to and when I was done I knew I just knew that that was God. The craziest thing about it was that when I went back in to get my feedback. (where they tell me what I did wrong and what I did right) They said I was too relaxed. They said I didn’t have enough military barring. As they were saying this too me I just smiled. I was happy with being too relaxed because I felt like God was showing me that he can do anything. He can make your worry and fears go away. So award or no award I learned something very valuable today.

God Bless! J

"Was this sent from God?"

Upon leaving study on Wednesday Wayne calls and very angrily expresses his tire has gone flat... I can hear the frustration and his pain 230.00 for a tire and hes struggling:( I express to him, I'm sorry... etc, etc be supportive and ask what he needs. He says a quarter to get some air I'm by your house is there a quarter there? I said yes... call if you need me! Normally I would have ran to his service... Not today??? HMMM... I bought the books and we walked outside. My dear loving friend Jessica stood outside sick with me and ministered to me and prayed over me for an hour, Thank you soooo much... I CANNOT begin to explain how quickly the devil began to work. immediately leaving the group... the call, and my instant thoughts of work and inadequacy. My ONLY plan, my ONLY focus was to get home and read, to read and embrace my self, and my alone time. Jenna had me scared to death lol. All I kept doing was questioning... Are you the devil? Did the devil send you? Were you sent to distract me? Are these thoughts the devil.... O Geeee I was freaking out!!! As I was saying though I hadn't made it to the stop light on Oakwood and Owen K and I had already convinced myself I needed to go to Walmart for something. I talked my self out of it, I said "O, no devil, you are to smart, not today" shopping... a HUGE weakness. How was I able to see this this time? I smiled, with such pride almost a smirk, I had defeat him! There was this amazing peace and and sense of control that came over me, like I was actually driving my car... I actually determined for the first time where I was headed. I know, how odd to say, or even grasp. Your probably wondering... Really??? Yes, really. Ten years of driving and all those times I heard, do this, you need this, such n such this... you mean God that wasn't me? Just simple lil ol' me just talking or reminding? That was actually the enemy??? WOW...

So I kept driving scared, man I was scared, I guess not soooo much scared but super alert (those who know me, Jess lol... alert and driving don't happen. LOL. Anyways, more thoughts began to come and I treated each one equally I actually debated every thought that entered my mind. I actually MADE a decision about EVERY thought that came to me. So I should go to Starbucks and read... No!!!!!!!!!! AlONE. Ok, doooot da doooo driving along, but I would really like some Starbucks:) ok, ok. JUST the drive threw. Get it and go. So I'm ordering Wayne would prob like some Starbucks he just had a rough time:) WAIT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Is this the devil???? Is he using my servant heart against me? Is he using my giving nature to separate me from God??? IDK? I avoided this one, I called Wayne and took his order:) I took over his Coffee and I said "15 minutes, 15 minutes that's all. To spend with your son!" see I justified taking him coffee by, the goodness of helping, the thought that that's what a christian does and that I hadn't seen my son all day because it was Wayne's day. Was this right, wrong... IDK? It made me feel good... I saw my son he filled my heart with joy and I left. As I was leaving I got a text from Wayne, A sweet text but a text saying "I already miss you, come back" ????? O No. No way!!!!!!!! I HAVE GOT TO GET HOME, that eery feeling came back the devil was lurking on me.

Needless to say I finally got home and a series of more lil things happened, laundry cleaning... me saying just do a little then you can read... Texts from friends 3 to be exact all men (and I'm single) so I again was like NO!!! Then a text from my dear friend, I have missed him hes been out of town... hes on his way home:) "I am kinda busy right now, but drive safe love. Hope your day was influential"

I amazed myself... No wait I wanted to see him? I have been waiting... ???? So confused... Yet so sure NOT tonight, Im not sure if the devil was using him:( now this person IS BY NO MEANS THE DEVIL, or not of God actually the complete opposite BUT I didnt trust the devil today...

I know i rambled and why share ALL this very normal and so obsolete stuff... Its life, this happens every second of every day!!!

"Was this sent from God?"

Take Every Thought Captive...

After our group last night I was thinking that it would helpful to remind myself of some scriptures that will help us to take every thought captive. 2 Corinthians 10:5 says, "We demolish arguments and every pretension that sets itself up against the knowledge of God, and we take captive every thought to make it obedient to Christ." Satan has a sneaky way of distorting the truth and Jesus faced this while he was on earth and gives us amazing examples of proclaiming God's truth through scripture!

Here are some scriptures that I find helpful:

Matthew 16:23:
"Jesus turned and said to Peter, “Get behind me, Satan! You are a stumbling block to me; you do not have in mind the concerns of God, but merely human concerns.” "

Hebrews 9:14
"How much more, then, will the blood of Christ, who through the eternal Spirit offered himself unblemished to God, cleanse our consciences from acts that lead to death, so that we may serve the living God!"

Philipians 4:13
"For I can do everything through Christ, who gives me strength."

Psalm 139:14:
“I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; your works are wonderful, I know that full well.”

Lastly, Amy brought up Philipians 4:8 during our class...so good!!
"Finally, brothers and sisters, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable—if anything is excellent or praiseworthy—think about such things."


What verses do you all cling to in order to take your thoughts captive?